Help understanding women

[AngelsShadow]

Okay so I am completely lost here. I've had one girlfriend dump me because she said she though of me more as a best friend, which dosent make sense to me because don't you want the person you love to be one of your best friends? Ivehad another girl dump me because she said I was to kind to people, now that makes no sense. On girl dumped because she said she felt like I was to into music and I was to poetic.

Now here's why I am confused, these are the vary things that these girls said they loved about me. So WTF is going on. I am genuinely tired of girls being such a pain.

 

[3823]

Well, first of all... don't make a generalization. All girls are not like that >.<

They all sound shady. I don't think that's normal. If you're still in contact with the most recent one, you should try talking to her about it. Truth is, people's tastes change over time and maybe she felt like the compatibility between you two was lost. I don't know for sure. Best thing to do is forget about in a conceited way. It's their loss if they don't have me in their life xD

 

[AngelsShadow]

Well, first of all... don't make a generalization. All girls are not like that >.<

They all sound shady. I don't think that's normal. If you're still in contact with the most recent one, you should try talking to her about it. Truth is, people's tastes change over time and maybe she felt like the compatibility between you two was lost. I don't know for sure. Best thing to do is forget about in a conceited way. It's their loss if they don't have me in their life xD

Thanks. Its weird I had known all of them for at least two or three moths before we started dating. Idk I guess just all the girls I've liked/dated weren't who they were showing the world. I am still waiting for the day I find a girl that is like me.

Thanks for caring enough to help out Rawrrie

 

[3823]

Thanks. Its weird I had known all of them for at least two or three moths before we started dating. Idk I guess just all the girls I've liked/dated weren't who they were showing the world. I am still waiting for the day I find a girl that is like me.

Thanks for caring enough to help out Rawrrie

Awww no problem. ^^

People change, emotions change. We just gotta deal with it. Communication is important. I'm sure you will find that person ^-^

 

[PersonSP]

(You might just have a bad taste in women...)

The "too nice" thing is actually explainable.
In a relationship there needs to be a certain balance. If one person has a very strong personality it is better if the other has too. For example, if she teased you and you didn't do anything back she might start feeling guilty, while she just wanted you to tease her back a little. Sometimes people need someone to say "no" to them once in a while. She probably didn't mean you're too nice (that is a very odd expression) but rather you gave in too much.
My dad had a girlfriend (way before my time) who took every tease seriously and apologised for every little thing. That was sweet, but she never stood her own ground. She might have held very different opinions from my dad but she always gave in when he tried to start a debate. He wanted to know what she really thought, but since she always gave in and never voiced her own opinions they grew disconnected. After some time they broke up because she was "too nice". Of curse that case was a little extreme, but you get the picture, right?
It's fine to be agreeable or a little sensitive to teasing but I bet this girl was looking for someone who voiced his own opinions a little more strongly. That doesn't mean you should change, it means your relationship just was 'meant to be'. That just happens, let it go.

I hope you understood all that, giving relationship advice is hard, but in English it's even harder.

 

[AngelsShadow]

(You might just have a bad taste in women...)

The "too nice" thing is actually explainable.
In a relationship there needs to be a certain balance. If one person has a very strong personality it is better if the other has too. For example, if she teased you and you didn't do anything back she might start feeling guilty, while she just wanted you to tease her back a little. Sometimes people need someone to say "no" to them once in a while. She probably didn't mean you're too nice (that is a very odd expression) but rather you gave in too much.
My dad had a girlfriend (way before my time) who took every tease seriously and apologised for every little thing. That was sweet, but she never stood her own ground. She might have held very different opinions from my dad but she always gave in when he tried to start a debate. He wanted to know what she really thought, but since she always gave in and never voiced her own opinions they grew disconnected. After some time they broke up because she was "too nice". Of curse that case was a little extreme, but you get the picture, right?
It's fine to be agreeable or a little sensitive to teasing but I bet this girl was looking for someone who voiced his own opinions a little more strongly. That doesn't mean you should change, it means your relationship just was 'meant to be'. That just happens, let it go.

I hope you understood all that, giving relationship advice is hard, but in English it's even harder.

Ah I see what your saying. Yeah that can be me sometimes. I have like three different moods though overly nice, sarcastic as hell but in a fun sort of way, and dont give a F about anything, it all depends on who I'm with and what I'm doing. Oh and I forgot to mention dead serious (This one tends to bug some people but I only use it when I need to be professional.).

 

[PersonSP]

Ah I see what your saying. Yeah that can be me sometimes. I have like three different moods though overly nice, sarcastic as hell but in a fun sort of way, and dont give a F about anything, it all depends on who I'm with and what I'm doing. Oh and I forgot to mention dead serious (This one tends to bug some people but I only use it when I need to be professional.).

Believe me, you probably have more than 4 moods and at least a dozen in-betweens, you just don't notice them. But I'm glad you understood my blabbering because giving love advice in foreign language is pretty hard.

 

[AngelsShadow]

Believe me, you probably have more than 4 moods and at least a dozen in-betweens, you just don't notice them. But I'm glad you understood my blabbering because giving love advice in foreign language is pretty hard.

I understood it. It made a lot of sense. What is your native language?

 

[PersonSP]

I understood it. It made a lot of sense. What is your native language?

Dutch. If you don't know how that sounds, imagine a German (without the thick accent) having a stroke. At least that's how most people describe it. My English is pretty good (I graduated top of my class) though. Since most people here speak fluent English as well as Dutch we can have fun with multiple languages in one song:

I fully understand that, hbu? But it gives a fair idea of how Dutch sounds. I don't think it sounds like someone having a stroke, but oh well.

 

[AngelsShadow]

Dutch. If you don't know how that sounds, imagine a German (without the thick accent) having a stroke. At least that's how most people describe it. My English is pretty good (I graduated top of my class) though. Since most people here speak fluent English as well as Dutch we can have fun with multiple languages in one song:

I fully understand that, hbu? But it gives a fair idea of how Dutch sounds. I don't think it sounds like someone having a stroke, but oh well.

I have listened to Dutch bands before but not with the singer from counting crows lol! I was certainly surprised by that. The only Dutch band I can remember listening to had an Air plane on the album cover, idk why I can't remember the name of the band.

If I could I would learn, Japanese, Dutch, and I can't remember which African dialect it was, I think it was Ugandan. But instead I'm learning French uhggggg I'm not going to use that in California why couldn't I have at least learned Spanish something I can actually use.

Being a musician I love new sounds so I tend to really like music from other countries.

 

[PersonSP]

I have listened to Dutch bands before but not with the singer from counting crows lol! I was certainly surprised by that. The only Dutch band I can remember listening to had an Air plane on the album cover, idk why I can't remember the name of the band.

If I could I would learn, Japanese, Dutch, and I can't remember which African dialect it was, I think it was Ugandan. But instead I'm learning French uhggggg I'm not going to use that in California why couldn't I have at least learned Spanish something I can actually use.

Being a musician I love new sounds so I tend to really like music from other countries.

We have about 10 great bands/ artist here (small country) but most sing in English anyway. xD

I did 3 years of each French and German and 5 of Mandarin. Believe me Mandarin is easier than French. I plan on learning Swahili (lingua franca in a big part of Africa) and finishing my courses for Mandarin. Understanding Dutch is pretty doable, using the right grammar will be a pain. It's still easier than German though. I doubt you'll use it a lot in California though, and you can use French in California to impress girls.

 

[AngelsShadow]

We have about 10 great bands/ artist here (small country) but most sing in English anyway. xD

I did 3 years of each French and German and 5 of Mandarin. Believe me Mandarin is easier than French. I plan on learning Swahili (lingua franca in a big part of Africa) and finishing my courses for Mandarin. Understanding Dutch is pretty doable, using the right grammar will be a pain. It's still easier than German though. I doubt you'll use it a lot in California though, and you can use French in California to impress girls.

Really any language besides English and Spanish will impress just about anyone here lol. In SoCal we have a large Mexican population. And in the county I live in there is a large Vietnamese population so I should probably learn that one too.