im an outcast need help
- Thread starter 87Duel
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FirstSerpent
Button Masher
Towns Folk
Try your best not to draw too much attention to yourself? Just be part of the crowd. You'll find the more comfortable you are with a group of people, the more relaxed you'll get. That takes time. Don't fidget too much. Try to stay calm. Remember to breathe, and don't talk too fast. That's usually what I do to blend in.
-From a Kid with Social Anxiety.
-From a Kid with Social Anxiety.
R
Rin
Nintendo 3DS Legend
Towns Folk
Adding on to @FirstSerpent 's comment, don't just throw yourself into a group of people and call it done, especially if you're not used to it. Try to get used to being around a very small group of people, then gradually work your goal up until you can safely be around groups of people.
Personally I just isolate myself and avoid most everyone else entirely, but I'm assuming you DON'T want that so I wouldn't recommend it. Some people are happy isolated that way, others aren't, and that goes for everything else, I guess.
Also, if you are being bullied, you should probably tell someone about it, depending on how severe it gets. Anything mean they say to you should never be taken seriously. Some people (bullies) just need to stop being a jerk and grow up...
Personally I just isolate myself and avoid most everyone else entirely, but I'm assuming you DON'T want that so I wouldn't recommend it. Some people are happy isolated that way, others aren't, and that goes for everything else, I guess.
Also, if you are being bullied, you should probably tell someone about it, depending on how severe it gets. Anything mean they say to you should never be taken seriously. Some people (bullies) just need to stop being a jerk and grow up...
1
18
Lime Pawpaw
Towns Folk
Be happy that you and your friend have each other at the very least 
It isn't something that's gonna happen overnight. If you have a few people you are a little friendly with, get closer to them, and after you have a whole bunch of friends - well, you'll not even notice, but you'll have stopped being an outcast.
I can't explain it this way - the obvious thing is 'be friendly with everyone' - but in what way are you and your friends outcasts, if you can tell? That would help everyone in understanding and giving better advice.
A related piece of advice: If you're an outcast because your opinion and the opinion of the popular kids in school differ, don't ever change yourself over that. If, for example, they treat you like outcasts because you like, say, anime or a certain type of music, don't try to change your feelings towards stuff like that just to fit in. Being happy with yourself is better than being popular. You have your friend, who can sympathize, and that's a huge blessing.
It isn't something that's gonna happen overnight. If you have a few people you are a little friendly with, get closer to them, and after you have a whole bunch of friends - well, you'll not even notice, but you'll have stopped being an outcast.
I can't explain it this way - the obvious thing is 'be friendly with everyone' - but in what way are you and your friends outcasts, if you can tell? That would help everyone in understanding and giving better advice.
A related piece of advice: If you're an outcast because your opinion and the opinion of the popular kids in school differ, don't ever change yourself over that. If, for example, they treat you like outcasts because you like, say, anime or a certain type of music, don't try to change your feelings towards stuff like that just to fit in. Being happy with yourself is better than being popular. You have your friend, who can sympathize, and that's a huge blessing.
PersonSP
Writing- 'n-Drawing-aholic
Towns Folk
You said that being yourself is part of the problem. As a first; Do not try to change yourself. Everyone is unique and awesome in his or her own way. You too. Secondly though it might take some time to figure out how to maybe you could be more honest. That means say what you think and dare to act upon it. I know people (in particular teenagers) can be very judgemental but if you do not feel ashamed and stand for what you are they will accept that. (Gosh, I sound like the dog-whisperer...."Be the leader of the pack!" It's not meant like that.) And don't you ever feel ashamed of who you are and what it is that makes you be. Also, confidence is build not forced. People who force themselves to appear confident are usually quite unhappy.
As with confidence and happiness building; try to find as many simple nice things you can around you. For example; "Oh great, sunshine!" or "Look at that beautiful flower." NOT "Oh they were kind of nice to me I suppose that is a good thing.". Same goes with confidence find some things you like about your looks (Do you have beautiful eyes? You probably do.) and if that goes well than try the same with your personality. Try to think of as many things as possible; from loyal to friends to can be serious when needed. Also; try to smile as much as you can even if you don't really feel like it. Research has proven that upping the corners of your mouth will actually make you feel more happy.
Weird tip: Do not try to fit in. I know that you want to fit in but by changing yourself to fit in or trying to launch yourself into a group of people you usually achieve the opposite. And of course, it is to love what you have not to have what you love. Cherish your friends. Being a part of a big group may seem appealing but after tying both I like a close knit group of friends much more than a big group of faces and names I hardly know anything about.
Before I forget; http://forum.3dspedia.com/threads/free-smiles-cheer-up-thread.7280/#post-96982 It's a link to the cheer up thread, if you ever feel a bit down, that's a great place to go.
As with confidence and happiness building; try to find as many simple nice things you can around you. For example; "Oh great, sunshine!" or "Look at that beautiful flower." NOT "Oh they were kind of nice to me I suppose that is a good thing.". Same goes with confidence find some things you like about your looks (Do you have beautiful eyes? You probably do.) and if that goes well than try the same with your personality. Try to think of as many things as possible; from loyal to friends to can be serious when needed. Also; try to smile as much as you can even if you don't really feel like it. Research has proven that upping the corners of your mouth will actually make you feel more happy.
Weird tip: Do not try to fit in. I know that you want to fit in but by changing yourself to fit in or trying to launch yourself into a group of people you usually achieve the opposite. And of course, it is to love what you have not to have what you love. Cherish your friends. Being a part of a big group may seem appealing but after tying both I like a close knit group of friends much more than a big group of faces and names I hardly know anything about.
Before I forget; http://forum.3dspedia.com/threads/free-smiles-cheer-up-thread.7280/#post-96982 It's a link to the cheer up thread, if you ever feel a bit down, that's a great place to go.
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