Is this poem good?

[Mira]

l have some interest in poetry. This is my first one. l hope l did good.

I Have A Dream:

"l have a dream
A dream to see
My precious dear
Rise from the blue sea

She cannot see
She cannot hear
The voices in my mouth

Like a toy no one plays at certain age
I am the navy blue sea with a sun to shine on no longer

Loneliness occurs
Tears from a well
Give my dear to tell
To shine my blue sea today

I have a dream
A dream to see
My precious dear
Rise from the blue sea."

 

[sanwich]

Thats a very nice peom!

 

[Icemario]

I guess it's okay, though coming off from some very deep and well known poetry it feels barren in depth, overly basic, has a vague rhythm, and there's barely any lingual or structural techniques used, if any at all. It feels like you're writing poetry for the sake of writing poetry. There's nothing wrong with that, mind you, but it usually makes the poetry output less meaningful, which hurts the overall quality because I feel poetry is about the conveying of feelings.

What's your overall message here?

 

[Mira]

I guess it's okay, though coming off from some very deep and well known poetry it feels barren in depth, overly basic, has a vague rhythm, and there's barely any lingual or structural techniques used, if any at all. It feels like you're writing poetry for the sake of writing poetry. There's nothing wrong with that, mind you, but it usually makes the poetry output less meaningful, which hurts the overall quality because I feel poetry is about the conveying of feelings.

What's your overall message here?

Well, it's about a person is sad about his lost and unknowned-location lover. and he is begging and hoping of her return. So the person has feelings of sadness and hoping for her to return.

 

[3823]

I like it ^-^

I'm not a poem pro tho,

I could probably sing this into a song.

 

[XxTomokixX]

Pretty good, did you come up with it? It kinda sounds like something I heard before but i'm not sure. Anyways, I'm pretty impressed. I made a poem once and I got a good rating from it, but it was rushed and only took like an hour.

 

[Mira]

Pretty good, did you come up with it? It kinda sounds like something I heard before but i'm not sure. Anyways, I'm pretty impressed. I made a poem once and I got a good rating from it, but it was rushed and only took like an hour.

Thanks! And yeah. lt is a poem l made up. What poem did you make? Can you share it?